Walking on the Moon, Bhrotain-style

As I drove up the A93 in gradually deteriorating conditions, I was amazed at the wilderness which developed before me. The Cairngorms were clad in Winter claes and The Police were playing in the car. Sometimes I get an idea for a title report and their song would be very apt. I slalomed into the Linn of Dee car park and was fortunate that Graeme D and a couple of other very helpful chaps were able to push me back out. Was this a bad omen? Once we had packed and attempted to help an unfortunate Yaris owner with 3 functioning tyres, we started the walk along the Land rover track to White Bridge. This allowed us to catch up since our last sojourn and clearly a lot had happened. A throwaway 'Alles in Ordnung' phrase at work had prompted an unbelievable 20 minute discussion, typical of current NHS corporate mentalities. Graeme said that in future it would be wise to use Hebrew.

The glen was white and the cloud level was very low. We doubted whether a view would be had from the top, if we got there. The 'if' being dependent on how deep the snow would be. After crossing White Bridge, we began the walk up to the Chest of Dee and were surprised by how firm the ground was. After 1 hr 45, we were at the bottom of Carn Fiachlach Beag and began the ascent. Soft snow rapidly became harder as we climbed and I proclaimed at 645m, we only had 500m to go with 2 miles of distance - could it really be so straightforward in such seemingly difficult conditions? The answer of course was no and I donned my goggles as the increasing blankness of the landscape began to strain my eyes. We could have been walking on the moon for all we could see. And we certainly weren't taking giant steps. We plunged off 3 foot shelves and had gaits of drunk men, laughing and cursing at the same time. Erufoh, ceerobee.

The climb up on to Carn-Clioch-Muillin (946m) was tough and the minutes flew past. Unfortunately, from here it was a descent down terrain that defied gravity - were we going up, were we going down? Reliance on the compass, map and sat nav saw us at the rime-iced trig point and summit cairn in 4 hours and 40 minutes of tough walking. I hacked at the ice, just to make sure the trig point was there. I wouldn't be back for a second time. Instead of re-tracing our steps, we descended due East and took turns to stumble and bum-slide our way to the bottom of the hill and back to the track. From here, we had the long and increasingly sore walk back to the car. Caffeine-fuelled chocolate were small comfort but after 8.5 hours, we finally reached the Linn of Dee. A very hard-earned tick and Graeme's 141st Munro.